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Writer's pictureLily Jay

Men and Women Are Not Equal - And That’s Exactly How It Should Be

The conversation around gender equality has taken center stage in modern discourse, often insisting that equality means sameness. But Islam challenges this narrative with a more nuanced view: men and women are not the same, and they’re not meant to be. While they are equal in their worth and accountability before God, their roles in this world differ—by divine design. This difference is not oppression; it’s balance. Yet, it remains a concept many find controversial in today’s climate.


Equal in Value, Different in Function

Islam makes no apology for acknowledging that men and women are created differently. These differences are not accidental or cultural—they are intentional and rooted in divine wisdom. The Quran reminds us:


“And the male is not like the female.” (Quran 3:36)

This isn’t a statement of superiority but of distinction. Men and women were created with unique strengths and roles to complement one another. To claim that equality can only exist through sameness dismisses the beauty of their complementary nature.

Islam does not shy away from assigning specific responsibilities. Men are designated as the providers and protectors of the family:


“Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has given the one more (strength) than the other, and because they support them from their means.” (Quran 4:34)

Does this make men superior? No. It makes them responsible. Women, on the other hand, are often entrusted with nurturing roles that shape future generations. Does this make women confined? Absolutely not. Islam honors women as leaders in their households and acknowledges their right to work, earn, and contribute to society.


The Modern Misunderstanding: A Clash of Narratives

The idea that men and women must have identical roles to achieve equality is a modern construct that Islam rejects. Equality doesn’t mean sameness—it means fairness. In our quest to erase all distinctions, modern society often ignores a fundamental truth: fairness recognizes differences.


Consider this: A man cannot carry the physical and emotional burden of pregnancy, just as a woman is not required to shoulder the financial burdens of her household. Yet, in today’s narrative, to acknowledge these differences is labeled "oppressive." Islam counters this by celebrating the unique strengths of both genders rather than forcing one into the mold of the other.


Controversy in Practice: A Role Reversal?

Critics argue that Islam’s gender roles are outdated and patriarchal. But let’s ask a difficult question: Has the erasure of traditional roles truly liberated us, or has it created more chaos? With rising rates of broken families and declining mental health in societies that champion "sameness," Islam’s emphasis on defined roles emerges as a solution, not a problem.


Why is it controversial to say men and women are different? Perhaps because the modern world equates difference with inequality. But Islam teaches us that these differences are not just necessary—they’re empowering. A society functions best when individuals contribute their unique strengths, not when everyone tries to fit into the same mold.


The Divine Perspective

Ultimately, Islam is not concerned with the fleeting approval of modern ideologies. It is grounded in timeless truths. The Quran makes it clear that the ultimate measure of worth is not gender but piety:


“Indeed, the most noble of you in the sight of Allah is the most righteous of you.” (Quran 49:13)

This verse dismantles the argument that differing roles imply differing value. Men and women are judged equally by God, held to the same moral and spiritual standards, and rewarded based on their deeds—not their gender.


A Call for Reflection

Islam’s stance on gender roles is not designed to appease modern sensibilities but to align with divine wisdom. It’s time we ask ourselves: Is the modern obsession with erasing all differences between men and women truly serving humanity, or is it creating unnecessary friction?


Men and women are not equal in their roles, and that’s not a flaw—it’s a feature. It’s a design that fosters harmony, balance, and mutual respect. This is not oppression; it’s liberation from the unrealistic expectation that equality means sameness. Perhaps it’s time to stop fighting this truth and start embracing it.




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